I arrive at the river

I look at myself

there in the clear water I see

the rot is in me

I saw it I took it I shared it

not wanting to see

the pain it caused to you and me

I want to run away but

I want to swim in the water

I don’t want to look at myself but

I want to love myself

I want to be perfect but

I want to be better

I want to hide but

I have to see myself

to let go

to grow